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Overture 3: How to Forever Alone

The last time I ever directed a movie (Fandom Live not counted), was back in 2008. That's almost a decade back. I joined some short film production in 2012, but I turned out more like to be a pest on the set than a help. I didn't know what to do. And they didn't know what to make me do. Filipinos have a word for it — which is now synonymous with my name.  

I have a small project going on right now. And because it's mine, and mine alone, I had to do all the preparation myself. I never realized how much I have forgotten, until I started this project. In fact, I may NOT have learned anything in school and the workshops I went through.

I'm not saying my teachers and mentors were bad. I'm pretty sure they are top of the line. They are still active professionals in the Philippines' local industry. Or so Facebook keeps on telling me. I'm saying I learn differently. And it's now obvious, based on three decades of education, I don't learn in a classroom environment.

I remember I was such a little genius back when I was in first and second grade. I went to these Montessori-like schools where you would choose which class you want to attend. In fact, you can choose different ones every day.  I remember memorizing the capitals of every established country and their respective flags. I remember learning the evolution and extinction of the dinosaurs.  I even knew every species identified back then. I remember being able to explain to my family what is a lunar eclipse and why this phenomenon happens. I remember being able to determine every internal organ a human being had. I could tell their exact position in the body. I remember drawing 7-year-old's life-size poster of a man and his internal organs. I remember my brother telling me, "Your brain looks like an army camouflage."  (I did say I was a genius, not gifted in visual arts.)

After all the required education I had to go through, it all comes down to this: I learned the basics of screenwriting on my own; I learned Adobe Photoshop and Premier on my own; I learned HTML and CSS code on my own ( to the rescue!). 

This conclusion made me realize there's only one way to do things. Even the things that will make your life easy. Even the ambitions you chose to pursue. Because, even when you ask for help, you start to do the asking one way.

You do it ALONE.

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