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Overture 2: What Do I Want?

Today I have an appointment with the optometrist. I thought that it's about time to get my eyes checked, seeing as I'm not getting any younger. Although, I can still clearly see without glasses, sometimes when it's too near it becomes a bit blurry. When I was in 10th grade, I was nearsighted and astigmatic. But I stopped wearing eyeglasses more than 15 years ago.*

Because of this, I have started feeling my age. I've grown older, but still haven't grown up. When I check Facebook, all I see is the world turning. I take my eyes off Facebook, and all I see are cobwebs clinging to me.

I look back to my first days in the Bay and remember the extraordinary experiences I encountered. I met Hollywood celebrities for free. I was in a Mythbuster episode. I was part of two award-winning short movies. I had an interesting life.

Sure I was doing them mostly alone, but I was doing something.

So what changed?

I'd like to blame other people. Especially this particular person who drains the life out of me. The pressure they place on me, the expectations, the restrictions. But I should be honest with you and myself. I'M THE PROBLEM.

I used to have this strong conviction and strategy on how to achieve my ambitions. But I let myself get distracted. Get de-railed. Get off-track.

How do I go back?

Find out what I want to do with my life. As much as I have to decide what name I would be using for the rest of my life... I must come up with an answer to this very important question. 

* I still have 20/20 vision. Astigmatism has come back though. So to keep my eyes aligned right, I'd have to wear new prescription glasses. Ugh! Bye $200

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